I'm back

At this moment I'm slumped on my bed recovering from the post wedding post honeymoon whirlwind. I had a lovely time and it was all wonderful but I'm glad to get back to normality. Unfortunately I'm suffering from horrible period pains which I usually do when I've undergone some form of stress. I was planning to do some spring cleaning today but that's all gone out of the window now. Oh well, lets hope for less stomach grinding pain tomorrow.

While I was away I came across this very sad article in the Daily Mail.

Confessions of a very reluctant househusband

To sum the article up this man in his 40's is made redundant from a very high powered job. His circumstances are such that his wife goes back to work and he stays home to look after the children. He hates it because he feels that he is less of a man because he doesn't provide for his family.

To me this is very sad and an example of how rigid gender roles still seem to be. Most women would not feel guilty for loosing a job and being a stay at home mother. If anything they would be praised for it in some quarters. Clearly this man still feels the pressure to 'be a man' in terms of bringing home a wage. Luckily his partner clearly values him for his support at home and shows her gratitude to him when he looks after the children when they are sick.

However the pressures of wider society have made him feel bad about himself which is ridiculous. He saw nothing wrong with his partner staying home with the children but somehow it is unacceptable to him when the situation is reversed. Why? The children are happy and well cared for, as far as I'm concerned that is a job well done. I appreciate that some of his distress is because of the adjustment and also loosing his career, but clearly some of it is routed in his feelings of inadequacy because he's doing a 'women's role'. 

His attitude clearly illustrates two points, the first being that housework and childrearing is still considered inferior to working outside of the home and secondly that it is considered a women's role and a man is somehow less of a man if he takes it on.

Clearly as a society we still have a lot of work to do to break down these perceptions about housework. Nobody should be made to feel bad because they are a homebod, regardless of their gender, age, relationship status, educational level or financial status.